firedrop2007
Well-Known Member
I love my wife and I thought I knew what I was getting into before we were married. Having an open marriage was a lot of fun for about a year. After that it got harder and harder watching my beautiful wife flirt with strangers knowing what was going to eventually happen. I know she still loves me and I think it even bothers her that I am no longer active in that lifestyle. She wants me to go out with her when she goes to parties and has even tried to set me up with women. I think she feels bad that I am all alone when she goes out or feels guilty about having sex with other men and she is trying to justifying it by trying to set me up with other women.
The idea is foreign to me that you could really love someone however not be sexually attracted to the person. I guess I didn't know how marriage was going to affect me after this long. I have had to accept the fact that the love my wife feels for me runs deep but for some reason I do not sexually satisfy her. I try to think about it as little as possible, we do have sex from time to time however no matter what I do or how hard I try, "it" just isn't there for her when we have sex.
Unfortunately I did start to resent her for seeing other men. She did not want to go to a marriage counselor, she told me I knew what we were getting into when we got married and that I was the one that had changed. What made me mad was she was right, I was the one that had turned into the prude. Over the last year my resentment/anger was made worse by the fact that she has started bringing men home and even forcing me out of our marital bed while she is pleasured. I made the mistake of complaining about it and now my wife has made it into a game where she asks me to stay and watch from time to time. Using the word "awkward" is the understatement of the century to describe the feeling when you are sitting in the same room and even sometimes in the same bed when your wife is having intercourse with someone else that you know. It did get a little easier as time went on, I think it bothers some of her partners more to have another person watch when they have intercourse. Every once in awhile she won't ask me to join them or will ask me to leave if she feels it is a problem. However in most cases the men just don't care and just use her as they please. From time to time, in the heat of the moment the dirty talk can turn pretty personal, everything from calling her a slut or calling me a cuck or asking me if I "get off" on watching or asking her how a bigger dick feels. She always tells the truth and is never mean spirited about it but I really do think she is sexually turned on when she asks me to watch. Some men will even complement me on how good she was, most are saying it as an insulted directed at me but I think others are just being honest. I do not want to paint the picture that my wife is a slut or that she fucks a different stranger every other day. She does have quite a few different lovers but it is normally a set of 5 to 7 different men she has on rotation. Over time some go and will be replaced with another but she has a routine that I almost have down. From her mood that day and what she puts on before she goes out I can almost guess who she is going to bring home that night. It can be upsetting because some of her partners will leave after intercourse and others will spent the entire night servicing her and when that happens after about the second hour all I want to do is go to sleep but of course that isn't exactly possible. Sometimes I will just fall asleep in a chair but most times I will just sleep in the spare bedroom down the hall. I am still kept awake by all that noise. I do worry about STDs and pregnancy but she is on the pill and as far as I can tell always makes her lovers wear a condom. I guess the cuckold lifestyle is here if I like it or not.
Time passes…
It has been over a year since I wrote that. I am still happily married but I was STILL trying to find my place in this marriage and this oneway lifestyle. Up to that point I thought I understood what being a cuckold meant, little did I know I was just acting my part. I found out my wive really did love me but that there is more aspects to love and marriage then time spent in the bedroom.
I didn't notice anything really that different at first but her taste in lovers has changed over the last 3 months. At first I thought she was slowing down because she started going out less often and the number of men that visit have significantly reduced. I did start noticing her that her new lovers penis sizes start to increase. I would not say I have a small penis, however compared to mine theirs started making mine look like a cocktail wiener. Her lovers have also become more aggressive and abusive towards me. In several cases my wife has had to tell them if they didn't stop she would ask them to leave. It is a real blow to the ego when your wife is the one standing up for you in the bedroom of all places. She has also started dating black men I can't tell if she is turned on more by the whole interracial aspect or the fact that these men have huge penises. I do know that black lovers are much more dominate then most of the other men she brings home. One of these men has a penis that is so large he could easily star in a porno he looks to be just under 12 inches long and a diameter that looks to be just under the size of a 12 ounce can of soda. I am sure if my wife had to pick a favorite it would be him. He can inflict physical pain during intercourse however my wife never tells him to stop, well not for more then a few seconds at a time before begging for more. On several occasions she has bled a little after their love making sessions, she assures me that it is normal for women to bleed a little after aggressive love making. He is the only man that I know of that has cum in my wife. After breaking almost every condom he has used with her and when she has tried using a female condom his size caused more problems and discomfort so she lets him go bareback this of course is scary due to risk of STDs. At first she made him pull out before he finished but that stopped rather quickly in the relationship. She is still on the pill and I know where we can get ECPs so the risk of pregnancy is low.
Until this year I was normally fully clothed when I sat in with her, it wasn't really turn on for me to watch my wife get pleasured by strangers. She encouraged me to get more evolved and sometimes even invited me to have sex with her after she finished and her partner leaves. I guess as time went on and I did get more comfortable, I found myself getting aroused as I watched her get serviced especially by the more well endowed men. I think I started to take some sick pleasure in seeing my wife telling these men to stop because they are causing her pain with their penises only to beg and plead with them to keep going and screw her even harder only a few short seconds later. This was something I could never do because of my size. I have performed oral sex on her before and after her sessions many times although it was emasculating when she asks me to put my mouth somewhere a penis was only an hour or two earlier. Because she always made her lovers wear condoms all I had to contend with up until now has been the smell and taste of sweat, lube, and her fluids. Well that was until her new pornstar sized black lover. Up until this point in time I had never directly participated in any of her "sessions". I think she knew it bothered me and she didn't want to force me into anything I didn't want to do. After one of the marathon sex sessions with her favorite freakishly large black lover. He pulled out of my worn out wife and was admiring his handy work when he looked over at me and sarcastically asked me how I "liked the show?". I smarted off and told him that I think he enjoyed it a bit more then I did. I don't know but I think that pissed him off and he told me that I needed to learn my place and he ordered me to the bed. I stood up and walked over, he told me in a smug voice "look at that well fucked slut of a wife". In the same voice he asked her "Has he EVER fucked you like I did tonight". Not wanting to embarrass me she quietly answered, no. He snapped back and said, "no what?" She stammered and said "No he has never fucked you like you did tonight". He laughed and asked why she was looking at him when she said it, he told her she needs to tell the cuck that, as if I wasn't standing right there. He looked at me and asked if I REALLY loved her and I quietly told him yes. Laying next to her he reached down and spread her legs apart. He looked at her and told her he would "help" this time but training me was suppose to be her job. He snarled at me and asked what I was waiting for! Before I had a chance to ask he told me that my wife was a mess and it was a cuckolds job to keep her clean. I barely had a chance to process what he said before he was yelling at me again to get in here and "suck her clean". My wife quietly and submissively watched as this black man ordered her husband to eat her well fucked cunt. I crawled up between her legs and started licking, he reached down and and f...d my face against her opening and yelled at me to suck not lick! I do remember everything he told her that night about how a sissy cuckold should be treated in the bedroom. Something in me changed as he f...d my open mouth on her swollen cum soaked vulva. As I was f...d to suck the mixture of semen vaginal secretions and blood from my wife's cunt I was angry at first, I thought it was because this asshole was humiliating me in my own house in front of my wife. After looking up into her eyes and seeing the half numb blank stare directed at her black lover as she listened him and acted as if I didn't even exist as I felt her actively forcing the salty mixture into my waiting mouth. That was moment in time I realized I wasn't angry at her all this time or even the man forcing me to do this, I was angry at myself. I finally understood and started to embrace what I was and I shouldn't be ashamed of what I was doing.
I realized I was sharing the closest thing to an intimate moment with my wife as I could. I was here to love and support her in the best way I could, I finally let myself go and let myself become what my wife needed in the bedroom and I was glad to be by her side and would willing do anything that needed or asked of me in the bedroom. I hadn't felt that close to my wife in the bedroom in a very long time. As I worked my tongue into her well fucked hole I felt her vagina spasm and I was rewarded with another mouthful from her deepest recesses. I didn't even care about the derogatory comments coming from her lover about how much of a cum sucking pussy I was. I think I pissed him off because I didn't fight or resist from that point and that my wife seemed to be enjoying what I was doing. After about 10 minutes he grabbed me by the hair and yanked me out of the way before climbing back on my wife and fucking her harder then I had ever seen before. After watching for about 30 minutes I left them and went to the extra bedroom. All that night I stayed awake thinking about my acceptance into this lifestyle and listened to my wife get thoroughly serviced by her black stud.
The next morning she apologized about what had happened the night before. I was all smiles and told her as long as she loves me she would never have to apologized for anything. She looked at me strangely but I think somehow she knew something had changed with me. The next few months were unbelievable, after fully accepting who I was my wife and I became even closer. I had found my place in life and it was grand. I am a cuckold and I was proud to call her my wife. She has become comfortable with telling me what to do in the bedroom and what she expects of me before and after she gets fucked. I will do anything she asks without question. We have played all sorts of games with her lovers everything from locking me in chastely belts to erotic role playing where I had to pick what lover she was going have to sex with that night. I even know some of her lovers on a first name basis, this isn't to say I don't forget my place in the bedroom.
The idea is foreign to me that you could really love someone however not be sexually attracted to the person. I guess I didn't know how marriage was going to affect me after this long. I have had to accept the fact that the love my wife feels for me runs deep but for some reason I do not sexually satisfy her. I try to think about it as little as possible, we do have sex from time to time however no matter what I do or how hard I try, "it" just isn't there for her when we have sex.
Unfortunately I did start to resent her for seeing other men. She did not want to go to a marriage counselor, she told me I knew what we were getting into when we got married and that I was the one that had changed. What made me mad was she was right, I was the one that had turned into the prude. Over the last year my resentment/anger was made worse by the fact that she has started bringing men home and even forcing me out of our marital bed while she is pleasured. I made the mistake of complaining about it and now my wife has made it into a game where she asks me to stay and watch from time to time. Using the word "awkward" is the understatement of the century to describe the feeling when you are sitting in the same room and even sometimes in the same bed when your wife is having intercourse with someone else that you know. It did get a little easier as time went on, I think it bothers some of her partners more to have another person watch when they have intercourse. Every once in awhile she won't ask me to join them or will ask me to leave if she feels it is a problem. However in most cases the men just don't care and just use her as they please. From time to time, in the heat of the moment the dirty talk can turn pretty personal, everything from calling her a slut or calling me a cuck or asking me if I "get off" on watching or asking her how a bigger dick feels. She always tells the truth and is never mean spirited about it but I really do think she is sexually turned on when she asks me to watch. Some men will even complement me on how good she was, most are saying it as an insulted directed at me but I think others are just being honest. I do not want to paint the picture that my wife is a slut or that she fucks a different stranger every other day. She does have quite a few different lovers but it is normally a set of 5 to 7 different men she has on rotation. Over time some go and will be replaced with another but she has a routine that I almost have down. From her mood that day and what she puts on before she goes out I can almost guess who she is going to bring home that night. It can be upsetting because some of her partners will leave after intercourse and others will spent the entire night servicing her and when that happens after about the second hour all I want to do is go to sleep but of course that isn't exactly possible. Sometimes I will just fall asleep in a chair but most times I will just sleep in the spare bedroom down the hall. I am still kept awake by all that noise. I do worry about STDs and pregnancy but she is on the pill and as far as I can tell always makes her lovers wear a condom. I guess the cuckold lifestyle is here if I like it or not.
Time passes…
It has been over a year since I wrote that. I am still happily married but I was STILL trying to find my place in this marriage and this oneway lifestyle. Up to that point I thought I understood what being a cuckold meant, little did I know I was just acting my part. I found out my wive really did love me but that there is more aspects to love and marriage then time spent in the bedroom.
I didn't notice anything really that different at first but her taste in lovers has changed over the last 3 months. At first I thought she was slowing down because she started going out less often and the number of men that visit have significantly reduced. I did start noticing her that her new lovers penis sizes start to increase. I would not say I have a small penis, however compared to mine theirs started making mine look like a cocktail wiener. Her lovers have also become more aggressive and abusive towards me. In several cases my wife has had to tell them if they didn't stop she would ask them to leave. It is a real blow to the ego when your wife is the one standing up for you in the bedroom of all places. She has also started dating black men I can't tell if she is turned on more by the whole interracial aspect or the fact that these men have huge penises. I do know that black lovers are much more dominate then most of the other men she brings home. One of these men has a penis that is so large he could easily star in a porno he looks to be just under 12 inches long and a diameter that looks to be just under the size of a 12 ounce can of soda. I am sure if my wife had to pick a favorite it would be him. He can inflict physical pain during intercourse however my wife never tells him to stop, well not for more then a few seconds at a time before begging for more. On several occasions she has bled a little after their love making sessions, she assures me that it is normal for women to bleed a little after aggressive love making. He is the only man that I know of that has cum in my wife. After breaking almost every condom he has used with her and when she has tried using a female condom his size caused more problems and discomfort so she lets him go bareback this of course is scary due to risk of STDs. At first she made him pull out before he finished but that stopped rather quickly in the relationship. She is still on the pill and I know where we can get ECPs so the risk of pregnancy is low.
Until this year I was normally fully clothed when I sat in with her, it wasn't really turn on for me to watch my wife get pleasured by strangers. She encouraged me to get more evolved and sometimes even invited me to have sex with her after she finished and her partner leaves. I guess as time went on and I did get more comfortable, I found myself getting aroused as I watched her get serviced especially by the more well endowed men. I think I started to take some sick pleasure in seeing my wife telling these men to stop because they are causing her pain with their penises only to beg and plead with them to keep going and screw her even harder only a few short seconds later. This was something I could never do because of my size. I have performed oral sex on her before and after her sessions many times although it was emasculating when she asks me to put my mouth somewhere a penis was only an hour or two earlier. Because she always made her lovers wear condoms all I had to contend with up until now has been the smell and taste of sweat, lube, and her fluids. Well that was until her new pornstar sized black lover. Up until this point in time I had never directly participated in any of her "sessions". I think she knew it bothered me and she didn't want to force me into anything I didn't want to do. After one of the marathon sex sessions with her favorite freakishly large black lover. He pulled out of my worn out wife and was admiring his handy work when he looked over at me and sarcastically asked me how I "liked the show?". I smarted off and told him that I think he enjoyed it a bit more then I did. I don't know but I think that pissed him off and he told me that I needed to learn my place and he ordered me to the bed. I stood up and walked over, he told me in a smug voice "look at that well fucked slut of a wife". In the same voice he asked her "Has he EVER fucked you like I did tonight". Not wanting to embarrass me she quietly answered, no. He snapped back and said, "no what?" She stammered and said "No he has never fucked you like you did tonight". He laughed and asked why she was looking at him when she said it, he told her she needs to tell the cuck that, as if I wasn't standing right there. He looked at me and asked if I REALLY loved her and I quietly told him yes. Laying next to her he reached down and spread her legs apart. He looked at her and told her he would "help" this time but training me was suppose to be her job. He snarled at me and asked what I was waiting for! Before I had a chance to ask he told me that my wife was a mess and it was a cuckolds job to keep her clean. I barely had a chance to process what he said before he was yelling at me again to get in here and "suck her clean". My wife quietly and submissively watched as this black man ordered her husband to eat her well fucked cunt. I crawled up between her legs and started licking, he reached down and and f...d my face against her opening and yelled at me to suck not lick! I do remember everything he told her that night about how a sissy cuckold should be treated in the bedroom. Something in me changed as he f...d my open mouth on her swollen cum soaked vulva. As I was f...d to suck the mixture of semen vaginal secretions and blood from my wife's cunt I was angry at first, I thought it was because this asshole was humiliating me in my own house in front of my wife. After looking up into her eyes and seeing the half numb blank stare directed at her black lover as she listened him and acted as if I didn't even exist as I felt her actively forcing the salty mixture into my waiting mouth. That was moment in time I realized I wasn't angry at her all this time or even the man forcing me to do this, I was angry at myself. I finally understood and started to embrace what I was and I shouldn't be ashamed of what I was doing.
I realized I was sharing the closest thing to an intimate moment with my wife as I could. I was here to love and support her in the best way I could, I finally let myself go and let myself become what my wife needed in the bedroom and I was glad to be by her side and would willing do anything that needed or asked of me in the bedroom. I hadn't felt that close to my wife in the bedroom in a very long time. As I worked my tongue into her well fucked hole I felt her vagina spasm and I was rewarded with another mouthful from her deepest recesses. I didn't even care about the derogatory comments coming from her lover about how much of a cum sucking pussy I was. I think I pissed him off because I didn't fight or resist from that point and that my wife seemed to be enjoying what I was doing. After about 10 minutes he grabbed me by the hair and yanked me out of the way before climbing back on my wife and fucking her harder then I had ever seen before. After watching for about 30 minutes I left them and went to the extra bedroom. All that night I stayed awake thinking about my acceptance into this lifestyle and listened to my wife get thoroughly serviced by her black stud.
The next morning she apologized about what had happened the night before. I was all smiles and told her as long as she loves me she would never have to apologized for anything. She looked at me strangely but I think somehow she knew something had changed with me. The next few months were unbelievable, after fully accepting who I was my wife and I became even closer. I had found my place in life and it was grand. I am a cuckold and I was proud to call her my wife. She has become comfortable with telling me what to do in the bedroom and what she expects of me before and after she gets fucked. I will do anything she asks without question. We have played all sorts of games with her lovers everything from locking me in chastely belts to erotic role playing where I had to pick what lover she was going have to sex with that night. I even know some of her lovers on a first name basis, this isn't to say I don't forget my place in the bedroom.
